Forewarning: this is a very "real" post and has been super hard to write & come to terms with....
As I write this my eyes are filled with tears as I try to navigate my first few months as a "big girl." But, the truth is that even though I am a college graduate with big plans for my future I am still so confused with where I want to be, what I want to do, and who I need to please. I feel like I am a young girl not knowing what decision I need to make.
I originally thought that I wanted to be in my home state of N.C., but after countless phone interviews, and long days of searching high and low for something in my field I have come up empty and exhausted. I spent countless hours going back and forth in my head with what I needed vs. what I wanted. What was right vs. what was wrong. What I should have vs. what I deserve...and so on. I finally decided that since I wasn't having much success with my limited area that I wanted to be in that I should expand that area.
For those of you who have followed me for a while you know that I am extremely passionate in almost everything in my life, including what I want to do for the rest of my life- Public Relations and/or Event Planning. I want to do those things so bad it hurts. So, keeping in track with my career aspirations I decided I had to do what's right for me. No matter who or what it affected.
I am young. I have aspirations. I have dreams. I have goals. Now is the time for me to achieve those things. I can't always live in a big city or have my "dream job." But, right now I can do that... and I should do that.
And that is when I decided I needed to stop limiting myself to N.C. So, I began casually looking for jobs all over the place... D.C., Florida, NYC, California... everywhere that might have what I'm looking for.... and what happened?? I get a few leads. I researched companies and jobs and happened upon some things that made me happy (and excited!!!)
I am a very honest person. I had thought about keeping all this to myself. But, honestly, big stuff like this is hard to keep secret. I decided to share it. My parents are thrilled and know there is a whole world at my feet just waiting for me to explore it, while my boyfriend wants the best for me- but is tired of long distance and wants to be together......
So friends... life with Emily isn't always easy... ever. I try to stay positive on my blog, but in all honesty life isn't all wonderful all the time. Life is full of ups/downs, changes and decisions that we may not know the answer to....and that is where I am right now.
I would like to thank all of my readers for allowing me to be me through the good and the bad, happy and sad... and confused! xoxo